YORK'S been the focus of intense media attention since the news - revealed in this newspaper - that local boy Steve McClaren will be the next England manager.

In the eye of the storm was Steve's old PE teacher, Peter Bibby, who has been deluged by journalists clamouring for memories of his famous ex-pupil.

Most hacks were happy to sit on Peter's couch and gather anecdotes, but Calendar TV's Jon Hill bought an £8 football from Monks Cross and staged a filmed kick about with Peter in the hope that one or both of them might catch McClaren's eye as he scouts for fresh talent.

Things started promisingly, but - like with little boys everywhere - after only a couple of headers, the ball strangely drifted out of shot and disappeared.

When Hill's crew came to leave, the ball was still nowhere to be found; but luckily Jon had a receipt to claim his money back from ITV Yorkshire's accounts department.

We are thrilled to report that Peter later retrieved the ball from under someone's car, and returned it to Hill through The Press - well, thanks to our design editor, Lisa Cook, who's a mate of Peter's daughter.

A grateful Jon said he'd like to use the ball for more footie practice, but accounts have nabbed it for their five-a-side team.

THOSE darned Yanks are taking the mick out of us Yorkshire folk.

One of those email jokes circulating from across the Atlantic mocks our cultured accents. It goes like this: "Subject: Yorkshire Druggies. Clubbers in Harrogate, Yorkshire, England, have taken to using dental syringes to inject Ecstasy directly into their mouths. This is a very dangerous practice and is known as 'E by Gum'."

Tee-hee. 'E', by the way is the in word for Ecstasy.

Trust the Americans not to know that the people of Harrogate are far too posh to speak like this, but by 'eck, it is only a joke.

TALKING of foreigners, the Scots are a canny lot.

A colleague on a trip to Edinburgh paid a visit to the Rosslyn Chapel, which features strongly in Dan Brown's The Da Vinci Code, now a Hollywood blockbuster.

This sign was spotted at a neighbouring stables, where some Scot worthy of an honorary Yorkshirehood was cashing in on the explosion of interest in the mythology of the Holy Grail that has followed the book's success.

Could it have been intended as a comment on the novel's more implausible historical theories?

Updated: 09:48 Tuesday, May 09, 2006