MAXINE GORDON reports on a new approach to get the most from your relationship.

ARE you a frustrated single who keeps wondering why your relationships are forever breaking down? Or perhaps you are a couple who keep arguing over the same problems?

York relationships experts Peter Storr and Lindsay Smith reckon there are plenty of people out there who could benefit from sharing their experiences.

That's why they are setting up a series of group therapy sessions on Thursday evenings in York.

The first will take place next Thursday, May 20, and will be limited to ten people. But if it is successful, it is hoped to run more groups later.

Peter and Lindsay are both experienced counsellors and counsellor trainers and teach at York St John College as well as run private practice.

Lindsay said: "Most people seek the satisfaction of a close intimate relationship as part of a fulfilling life. We feel that this aspect of people's lives is worth a bit of close attention.

"Our series of meetings is designed to help single people who are contemplating new committed relationships, and those who are in relationship already and want to make the most of them." She added: "People can repeat unsatisfactory and unhappy experiences in a relationship without realising what it is that they could do differently."

Peter says while the thought of group therapy may seem daunting, there are many benefits from working this way.

He said: "You can learn from other people's experiences and you can have a try at relating to people differently. It is also useful to have people on hand to tell you how you are coming across to them."

He added: "There is a lot of talk about men and women being from different planets, but really, we are not so different from each other.

"We just have to find ways of understanding each other."

Having successful relationships is a difficult task, he said.

"There is an expectation that we know what to do, but relationships are very difficult things to get right, and you often don't appreciate that until they go wrong. It's not that simple and there is lots we can learn from each other."

He said a main aim of the course was to help people create strong relationships to act as a buffer against the stresses of life.

The ten-week course costs £150, which has to be paid in advance to secure a place. Each session will last around 90 minutes.

For more information, telephone 01904 716578 or email l.smith2@yorksj.ac.uk

Updated: 09:38 Tuesday, May 11, 2004