Dilemma: how to suggest that the wider British ESTABLISHMENT has snubbed York, without leaving us open to accusations of having either an inferiority complex, or a proverbial chip on the shoulder!

Wednesday, 30th November: the Archbishop's ordination:

1. Where were the Royal Family?

Did they, en bloc, have insufficient time to rejiggle their official diaries to accommodate this ceremony?

Open letter to HM The Queen:

Are you not the Supreme Governor of the Church of England, and therefore the wider Anglican Communion? Isn't Dr John Sentamu your representative in the Northern Province, or See, of YOUR Church?

If the idea of heading 200 miles north at relatively short notice was 'oppressive' for you and The Duke (or were you concerned about his saying the wrong thing to our increasingly eminent Ugandan Asian immigrant?) then where were the other leading members of 'The Firm'?

Whither the Heir Apparent, Prince Chas, The Prince of Wales and his consort, The Duchess of Cornwall? With all of his built-in advantages, one might have expected him to have 'his ear to the ground'!

Failing that, whither the Heir Presumptive, Prince Wills of Wales? Still on Work Practice with HSBC?

As prospective King, might this investiture in York not represent a worthwhile exercise in long-term Work Practice?

Scraping the barrel a little ...how about the black sheep of the family?

Some 20 years ago Ma'am, without apparently caring to canvas the prior opinion of the people of York, you inflicted Prince Andrew on us as Duke of York, when he married that redhead Fergie ...I mean Titian, of course, Ma'am, as Prince Andrew instructed us at the time! Could HRH not have honoured this City -the Second City of YOUR realm- whom you honoured by giving him OUR name, by being present?

Or did he have a pressing golfing appointment, elsewhere?

So papering over the cracks, the Duke of Gloucester was meant to be coming, but something more pressing resulted in his chopper facility at St P's School being superfluous to requirements! And the Duchess? Coming by train ...but unable to make it to York in time ...because some poor soul decided to 'end it all' by jumping in front of a train.

Conclusion: "Not Bloody Good Enough, Ma'am"!

2. H.M Government. As the leading Ugandan dignitary present is reported to have asked, "Where is the Prime Minister, Tony Blair?"

After all, Margaret Thatcher, when PM, had managed to find York and had attended a previous "Ebor" enthronement!

Answer, well, "Our Tone" was 'out on the road' playing at 'shuttle diplomacy': trying to save his British Bacon, no, that should be EU Presidency (his swansong?) from ignominious failure. Apparently over the inability to agree an EU Budget. Let alone accommodate those changes he wants to see in the CAP, in return for acquiescing to the reduction in, or disappearance of, the UK's notorious budget rebate.

So if Blur was unavailable ...how about the Deputy PM?

Wasn't the prospect of a picnic or barbecue in The Minster sufficient inducement to dine for "Two Jags"?

Well then, how about the Home Secretary? Wouldn't HE have been the appropriate Senior Cabinet Minister, if PM & DPM were both unavailable?

Also 'the PM in waiting' Gordon Bruin missed an opportunity to score some Brownie Points locally.

Par for the course: not good enough! More Governmental complacency!

3. The Church of England/those organising Wednesday's event.

I hear York's MP Hugh Bayley was NOT invited. He arrived and was, apparently about to be turned away ...as he did not have 'the best ticket in town'. 'Huge' Bayley stood his ground, stomped his feet ...and was eventually accommodated.

Well there MUST have been a couple of available seats ...if the Gloucesters couldn't make it!

How absurd NOT to invite York's Westminster representative. An outrage!

Updated: 15:46 Friday, December 02, 2005