MATTHEW Wignall and his York company Off The Rock Productions bring an original play to York's pop-up bar, The Fleeting Arms, but despite its big ambitions it does not land so grandly with the audience.

The premise to Wignall's play is an interesting one: protagonist Stephen Thornton (Matt Pattison) finds himself dead, much to his confusion. From here, he embarks on an interview with Ms Hope (Elizabeth Lockwood) to determine once and for all how he came to his demise.

It's a good framing device for the play and works nicely to split the narrative into episodic chunks. However, the script could benefit from a serious edit. There are often dialogues in which the same phrases and similes are repeated, which causes the pacing of the action to suffer. In trimming down some of the incidental dialogue the play might become a slicker performance.

The small cast stumbled over more tongue twister-esque phrases at a few points but otherwise proved an admirable ensemble. Special mention goes to Teej Jackson's laddish performance as Stephen's old school friend Greg. Anna Rose James also shines as a particularly peppy and charming Miranda, although the character is written, perhaps consciously, within the confines of a Manic Pixie Dream Girl trope, meaning there is unfortunately not a lot of development she can bring to the role.

The overall pace of the play seems a little confused at the moment. We are taken through each stage of the friendship between Stephen and his new lodger Harrington (Andy Love, who recognises the character's comedic potential), which slowly turns into an emotionally manipulative relationship. Considering such a gradual progression, the reveal at the play's finale suddenly feels rushed, with the audience not receiving much time to recover from the plot twists that unfold. It is a twist that audience members might not see coming and may require some suspension of disbelief but, after all, this is the afterlife, so anything can happen.

My main gripe with writer-director Wignall's play is its treatment of the afterlife. Despite its placement in the title, the play's focus is on Stephen's last months on Earth. This is interesting and makes for a dark play about being replaced, but there is a certain level of stakes lost within the bigger narrative.

As the play never directly discusses its stance on Heaven, Hell or an alternative to either, the audience are left wondering for the majority of the action just what could happen to Stephen. Indeed, the ending is suitably bleak for this dark comedy, which has great expectations but falls a little short. Given an edit, it could be a slick drama but for now there are a few too many loose endings wrapped up quickly.

Further performances: The Basement, City Screen, York, August 28, 7.30pm. Box office: ticketsource.co.uk/offtherockproductions; Basement, basementyork.co.uk