YORK shoppers dreamily wandering around the aisles of Clifton Moor Tesco's last week were shaken from their reverie by a fairytale giant apparently doing his weekly shop.

Had he run out of Englishmen's bones to make his bread? Was the goose that laid the golden eggs off colour?

No. The answer lies in that strange place known as panto land.

This big fellow was none other than Blunderbore, one of the stars of Jack and the Beanstalk which is running at the Joseph Rowntree Theatre from Saturday.

He had been brought to Clifton Moor as part of Rowntree Players' publicity drive. And the good-hearted folk at Tesco had allowed him to crash around the place.

"It was amazing how many shoppers were taking out their phones with cameras and clicking away," said Graham Smith of Rowntree Players.

Tesco's also let the actors have a gift voucher to buy sweets for children going to the panto.

A competition was held to find the best first name for Blunderbore. Three winners have been selected and will receive free tickets to the show.

They are: Jake Sissons of Pocklington, who suggested Badrick; Linda Major of York, with Gridlock; and Tracey Fawcett of York who put forward Thor.

For the first time this year Graham is playing the dame, Dottie Trot. He has started wearing his skirt to rehearsals to get a feel for it, but this has only led to his co-stars being unable to say their own lines for laughing.

Sounds promising. The show runs from December 4-11. Tickets cost £6 to £8 and are available on (01904) 761400, or from the Theatre Royal.

LAST Friday we reported how a computer calamity brought the Department of Work and Pensions to its knees.

The cock-up won't surprise Peter Simpson of York. He recently received a confusing and error-strewn letter from the DWP.

First he was presented with the continuing mystery of where this organisation is based. Should recipients write back to PO Box 10141, Dundee, DD1 9PS; or PO Box 10141, Dundee, DD1 9ZN? Or to the Belfast address mentioned on the back?

Inside, the forms insisted all the sections marked with a red cross were completed; strange, when sections were marked with a black cross.

Then there are those typographical mistakes: "Thank you for your recent inquiry," the letter begins. "Unfortunately it would appear as thought the documents confirming the end of your wives employment have been lost."

Even more helpfully, the reference number and the telephone helpline are, er, one and the same.

What does Mr Simpson, for 35 years a linotype operator at the Evening Press, think of all this?

"Not much."

MARGARET Lawson's inquiry as to what "Jo Malone" was all about has been answered. Richard Johns, Evening Press sub-editor and the Diary's newly appointed Health And Beauty correspondent, reveals it is the name of an expensive range of soapy products.

So pricey that you wouldn't get much change out of 30 quid for shampoo and conditioner.

FINALLY, this week marks the Diary's first birthday. We opened for business on December 1 last year with a tale about Jamie Oliver and a bag of oranges - but unfortunately we couldn't keep up that standard.

To celebrate the anniversary, I'm off. Just for a week. But the Diary is left in the capable hands of Steve "It's A Dead Cert in the 2.30" Carroll.

Updated: 11:39 Monday, November 29, 2004