Heading for Royal Ascot next week? STEPHEN LEWIS offers a few tips on protocol.

NOW then. The Queen, it was confirmed recently, will definitely be coming to York for Royal Ascot next week, along with other members of the Royal Family.

Grand news for York, this, and grand news for any Yorkshireman or Yorkshirewoman who enjoys a bit of pomp and ceremony - not to mention being one in the eye for snooty Viscountess Gormanston and her ilk.

It does leave race-goers here facing a potentially ticklish problem, however. Just what should you do and say if you should happen to bump into Her Majesty at the races?

It's not that unlikely. The Queen probably won't make an appearance in the Rails Enclosure along with the rest of the hoi-polloi, it's true. But she is expected to be at York Ascot every day. And she is known to enjoy strolling to the winner's paddock after races. So the chance of a Royal encounter, though slight, is real enough.

Buckingham Palace insists we shouldn't all feel duty bound to stand on ceremony. Many people content themselves with a simple 'hello' on coming unexpectedly face-to-face with the monarch, a spokesperson said. "That wouldn't be the end of the world."

Here in York, however, we want to do better. We want to show that when it comes to good manners and an understanding of how to behave in the politest of circles, we are up there with the best of them.

On that basis alone, a cheery 'how do, missus?' followed by a bone-crushing handshake probably won't cut the mustard - more's the pity.

If anyone is in a position to tell us how it should be done, it must be the Lord Lieutenant of North Yorkshire, Lord Crathorne. He has met more members of the Royal Family than you could shake a mitre at - including, on "quite a number of occasions", the Queen herself.

It is he, in fact, who will officially meet and escort the Queen on the first Tuesday of Royal Ascot.

So what is his advice on good form?

The first thing to remember to do, if you are a man, is to take off your hat, Lord Crathorne says. Do this with your right hand, bow - or at the very least incline your head respectfully - then transfer your hat to your left hand, so that your right hand is ready to shake hands with the Queen if she should offer to shake hands with you.

Do not, however, initiate a hand-shake: the Queen must make the first move.

Women are not expected to remove their hats, although good form would be to curtsey if introduced into the monarch's presence.

The correct way to address the Queen on first being introduced is as Your Majesty. Thereafter, if you do become drawn into a conversation, it is perfectly acceptable to address her as ma'am, Lord Crathorne says.

You shouldn't pepper your conversation with ma'ams, however - one or two during the course of your conversation, as a mark of respect, will be enough. When the time comes to say goodbye, you should once again address the Queen as Your Majesty.

And what about topics of conversation? Would it be appropriate to ask the Queen for a few racing tips? She is, after all, known for her thorough knowledge of racing?

"She is phenomenally knowledgeable about racing," says Lord Crathorne. "But I think asking her for tips would be pushing it a bit far." Good form, in fact, is not to try to initiate any topics of conversation yourself at all. Instead, Lord Crathorne says, you should simply respond to what the Queen says.

If that all sounds a little dull, your conversation with the Queen isn't likely to last very long. And at least it should mean you don't become tongue-tied.

The Queen is, the Lord Lieutenant says, "vastly well informed" on many subjects, as well as being experienced at making conversation. She is also good at putting people at their ease. "You can feel quite relaxed with her." She can also bring a conversation to a close without embarrassment, Lord Crathorn says. A nod or a polite "nice to speak to you" will leave you in no doubt she is about to move on.

There remains the problem of how you should stand, and what you should do with your hands, while you are in the royal presence. Slouching and sticking both hands in your pockets probably wouldn't be the best form. But you don't want to stand rigidly to attention, either, advises former butler to the nobility Ronnie Marshall.

Mr Marshall, who as butler for many years to Sir Marcus Worsley welcomed many members of the royal family to Hovingham Hall, advises a relaxed but attentive posture. And what should you do with those hands?

"A lot of people put one hand behind their back and the other hand down at their side, ready for a final handshake," Mr Marshall says.

Always supposing the Queen offers one, of course.

:: How to address members of the Royal Family

The Queen

On first meeting her, as Your Majesty. Thereafter as ma'am. On saying goodbye, as Your Majesty.

Male members of the Royal Family (such as Princes Philip, Charles, Andrew or Edward)

On first meeting them, as Your Royal Highness. Thereafter as sir. On saying goodbye, as Your Royal Highness

Female members of the Royal Family other than the Queen (such as Princess Anne, Camilla or Sophie)

On first meeting them, Your Royal Highness. Thereafter as ma'am. On saying goodbye, as Your Royal Highness

:: When Rachel met the Queen

RACHEL Baker likes to joke that when she heard the Queen was coming to Ascot, she considered inviting her for tea. It is, after all, less than two months since the two women last met. That time, it was at Buckingham Palace, when 59-year-old Mrs Baker - who has fostered 40 children over two decades - was presented with an MBE.

The highest tribute she can pay to the Queen is that if she did invite her to drop in for a Yorkshire cuppa, she would probably say yes.

Mrs Baker was nervous before being presented to the Queen, but Palace officials - and her determination to enjoy the occasion - helped to calm her down.

In their brief 30 second conversation, the Queen was able to ask her only a few questions.

"I didn't have to tell her my life story," she jokes. "She asked about the children I had looked after, and how many children I had looked after. It only lasted about 30 seconds, but she was interested as far as she could be. She was gently spoken, and she talked normally. It is difficult to form much of an opinion in just a short time, but she was a warm person, and if she had had more time I'm sure she would have been genuinely interested in what I do. She is interested in normal life and ordinary people. She is the same as us, after all. It is her position that has created this barrier, but aren't we all the same really, at heart? We're all human beings."

Updated: 11:21 Wednesday, June 08, 2005