We said good-bye to the 97 year old aunt of Sylvia’s brother in law at the crematorium. The service was led by a retired army chaplin, who takes services at Askham Bryan and other small churches in the area. The dear one had no children of her own but always loved the company of family and people she knew. The service was a simple celebration of her life and the renewed promise of heaven, given in the lovely soft Irish voice of the priest. It was followed by her niece telling about the times and love they shared together. Just the way she wanted it to be and everybody was better for it.

I asked if the crematorium was used by religions other than Christians and it is. It is encouraging to know that, at the end of the day, we can all take the same route to our destination, wherever it is. He said it was very much the same in the army where all religions have the same status with their own Chaplin, administers of faith whatever they are called. I also asked how old the tiny church at Askham Bryan was as I knew from the door arch that it was pre Gothic, therefore 1100s. He did not know but would get somebody who knew to tell me. That turned out to be a lady who had a lot to do with looking after it called Mary Carbert.

We had a get together at the cottage in which our loved one spent so much of her life with her husband in Askham Bryan and Mary invited Sylvia and I to look round the church. Unfortunately, experience has proved that it cannot be left open all the time. As it was a very cold day, Sylvia preferred to wait until the weather was warmer but I accepted. She has lived in the village for 70 years and has an obvious love for the ancient building and it’s history, doing much to care for it.

The doorway has the dogs tooth semi circular arch and extends from the side of the main, oblong building. As you enter, there is another door on the opposite wall, to the vestry, and this creates the shape of the cross if you were looking down onto it. The old stone font has a heavy carved wooden top as you enter on your left and the short area behind it has a small balcony above, reached by a tiny staircase. There are two short rows of chairs up there and the bell, which weighs a quarter of a ton and is tolled by Mary on Sundays. Up there, you are not far from the timbered sloping roof and slotted along one side, behind the timbers are two very long handled brushes used to remove cobwebs.

Downstairs again, looking up the length of the small church, is the east wall, behind the alter, which is exactly as it was built. Uppermost of it’s three windows is the unique ‘fish window’ formed in the original shape of the fish, which was the sign of Christianity. There are only five in the whole country. In front of the alter are two small choir stalls on the left, the pulpit on the right and the Communion rails in front. There were fresh flowers and the whole inside looked and felt well cared for and loved.

Hung around the walls are large old English writings of the Lords Prayer and Catechisms. There are also large old painted flags, shields and coats of arms of the once great, local Preston family. I was sorry that I did not have my camera but will make sure I do when I go back with Sylvia. I really did enjoy the personal tour afforded me by Mary. There are several people with keys in the village who are willing to open it for visiters.

We had a pleasant time going over old memories back at the house and the whole day was one to remember. When our daughter recently got married, Sylvia’s sister Margeret said, “Oh, I can just do with a good marriage.” You never hear anyone say “I could just do with a good funeral” but this was one such.