There is no subject on which everyone agrees 100 per cent. It can be eye-opening that such diverse views are held on any subject. Perhaps we should be more understanding of another person’s point of view, as we don’t know where their beliefs are rooted.

After a tearful Andy Murray was interviewed about his hip injury and future in tennis, there was a spectrum of opinions.

I’m not a particular fan of the sportsman, but do understand the emotional challenge when we have to make life changes at times not of our choosing. It’s tough and takes time to adjust.

Life events affecting ourselves or family, mean we have to make serious decisions, often leading to any future plans we may have, being thrown in the air.

When we have some control over the timing of such decisions, it will present a challenge, but we have some control. When events mean that we’re forced to make unplanned decisions, it can be difficult, as we have lost control. Last week, I was talking with a friend whose life has been turned upside down due to her husband’s ill health. She is struggling to adapt.

In Michelle Obama’s inspiring autobiography, Becoming, she talks of the adjustment that she had to make, when her lawyer boyfriend wanted to go into politics. It wasn’t what she wanted and initially life in the fortress White House and her loss of control was challenging and she had to adapt.

The former BBC Radio 2 presenter, Simon Mayo, is also coming to terms with life events, which were not of his choosing. Periods of adjustment can be experienced in stages. Shock, denial, anger, blame and acceptance. If these stages are familiar, they are the suggested stages of grief. Grief is about loss and can be felt about anything, a person, pet, work, ageing, freedom. I believe we often underestimate that in some situations, our emotional turmoil is due to grieving at loss.

Disappointment and hurt can often lead to new opportunities, as long as our eyes and ears are open.

Rita Leaman is a psychotherapist and writes as Alison R Russell ( /