Och aye, the ning nang noo!

Well, we finally made contact with the aliens.

When we recently called Beam Us Up Scottie in this column, we did not expect Scottie actually to beam down on us.

Our call for interplanetary communication came after we received a missive from the planet Datacomm, who speak in CompactSIP,PRI&BRI ISDN.

That was the only explanation for the press release we received from what appeared to be their earthly contact, Steve Leon, of Technopolis Communications Inc.

In a bid to tell us about how earthlings can benefit from the mind-blowing products on offer from Telesoft International, he related enthusiastically how: "TeleSoft technologies embed VoIP telecomm and datacomm capacities into consumer electronics and business systems - mobile handsets, PDAs, EV-DO cards, VoIP telephones, IP PBXs, VoIP chipsets, set-top boxes, SOHO routers, ATAs, IADs and more."

As most of us didn't know our IADs from our elbows, it seemed quite safe to assume that all this, plus other technologies provided such as CompactSIP, PRI&BRI ISDN, QSIG and ML-PPP, was formulated in a distant galaxy.

But now Steve, who no doubt spotted our Beam Me Up Scottie plea on our Yorkpress.co.uk website, has revealed the truth about these aliens.

He sent us a special message from his end of the cosmos: "Actually, the aliens speak with a Scots burr, and they are very pleased with taking over yet another web page," he said.