Are you really okay with that? (From York Press)

Are you really okay with that?

9:52am Wednesday 25th November 2009

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WORKING with people as a coach, a lot of the time I spend helping them to solve career and life problems, and set compelling goals.

All action oriented stuff and highly effective. Every so often though, when working with a client, we'll notice that a particular challenge keeps coming up. Perhaps it's an ongoing relationship conflict at work, or a problem of procrastination.

Now,there are many techniques to get under the skin of what's going on and zap the root cause into the cosmos, and I,know pretty much all of them. Still, occasionally it's not a question of "solving" the issue but simply accepting it.

So you can't stand Ebenezer from Customer Service? So you're lazy about that task you have to do every month and which always gets left to the last minute? OK,well, just BE with that. Just accept gleefully that you've got a block about old Eb, and welcome with open arms the fact that you cause yourself stress each month because you choose to be lazy.

The minute you do that you may notice a shift. Facing something you don't want to accept about yourself tends to release tension.

It is okay to be less than perfect.

When you fully accept the consequences of your choices you allow yourself to see that there might be better ones. Is it really worth feeling screwed up inside each time Ebenezer innocently walks past your desk? Do you really value the comfort of NOT doing something compared to the stress and self recrimination you put yourself through each month? Once you've accepted where you are you can more easily let yourself think about being somewhere else.

So what are you currently striving to solve or to achieve that simply needs to BE for a little while till your wisest self comes up with a better way forward?

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