I HAVE stumbled across an easy way for the privatised Royal Mail to stay in the FTSE 100. It is not only that the shares have increased in value since the flotation, but that the phone-line dealing with complaints must be a money-spinner.

I live in a flat and watched the postman fail to enter the block as the tradesman’s button was time expired. He did not try any of the other buttons to see if anyone was in.

I rang directory inquiries and asked to be put through to the Royal Mail number. I was told that it would cost £2.90 per minute, never guessing that the Royal Mail phone service was a pantomime of selecting numbers. At last, I spoke to a person, who told me that my post code did not exist.

I did get an apology, but now expect an additional £15 to £20 on my phone bill.

So I authorise The Press to give the Royal Mail my full name and address, so that I can receive some shares or a book of first-class stamps, whichever is the more valuable early next year.

Tony Martin, Clarence Street, York.