ARE the Tories’ eyelids sewn shut; is that why they can’t see the hardship they are causing through their ideological austerity?

As they appear in that long-running farce at Westminster... Let’s Pretend It’s Democracy, perhaps some pesky greasepaint has run into their eyes clouding their vision and sense of decency.

Victor Hugo could have written a contemporary novel about Les Misérable Tories... “Austerity”, adaptable as a West End musical extravaganza.

Stirring songs such as Pass The Food Parcel, Please Don’t Kick Me While I’m Down, Mr Osborne, Pay Me A Pittance Why Don’t Ya, and Eviction – It’s All We’re Good For. Even a seasonal song... Constituents Roasting On An Open Fire.

Or perhaps a film called Eyes Sewn Shut.

Even the Queen has experienced the Tories meanness on a personal level. Cabinet ministers had a whip round and bought her a set of... placemats!

Les Misérable lot!

Tom Scaife, Manor Drive, York.