COLUMN: Sometimes it's best to let it go

MOST of us have a breaking point when it comes to bad service. Some people complain at the drop of a hat; relishing the chance to vent their spleen. Others are more measured, and only complain if they really have to.

I like to think I’m in the latter camp. People who complain in public make me wince, especially if it involves raised voices and “making a scene”. I know a couple of people who I’m convinced look for things to complain about when we eat out; I’ve bitten my lip and looked away as they’ve interrupted a pleasant dinner by having a go at the waiter/waitress about something that usually isn’t worth it.

I will do anything to avoid complaining. Life’s too short, and it’s petty and pedestrian to whinge about a lukewarm tagliatelle in a high street gastro pub when there are homeless children somewhere in the world.

Even when I really have to complain, I try to make light of it. I guess it’s that British sense of restraint, of not wanting to make a fuss. And, having worked in shops, pubs and cafes when I was younger, I remember how I despised stroppy customers.

Traditionally, complaining isn’t considered British. We put up and shut up rather than cause an awkward scene. But it seems all that is changing. According to a new survey, consumer complaints rose by three million last year, with most aimed at retail, telecom and energy companies.

If you’ve never had a gripe with any of these firms, you’re lucky. Most of us will at some point have experienced blood-boiling frustration at a discrepancy with a fuel bill or a sluggish broadband supplier, and of course we have a right to complain.

When an ongoing problem with my electricity supplier once reduced me to tears, I did - but I didn’t take it out on the woman at the other end of the phone, because I knew it wasn’t her fault. It may involve a frustrating process, but complaining should be done politely.

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Even consumer rights champion Jasper Griegson, who describes himself as a “professional complainer”, says that while we should make ourselves heard, abuse isn’t the way to go about it.

I think our rising complaining culture has come from America, where demanding consumer rights comes as naturally as breathing. Americans simply won’t put up with poor service, and it shows. The quality of service in shops, bars and restaurants over there is so much higher than the UK, in terms of speed and efficiency.

If there really is no option, complaining - politely and calmly - has to be done. It just seems to me that unless it’s a burning issue, I can’t really be bothered.

A few months ago I went into a mobile phone shop seeking help with a recurring problem with my phone, and the assistant was spectacularly bad-mannered - to the point where he started walking away as he spoke to me, clearly not the slightest bit interested. “You’ll have to go back to where you bought it from,” he said, his voice fading into the distance as he wandered off. I thought about reporting him, but I just don’t want to be that mean-spirited pedant who gets someone into trouble with their boss. Would it have made me feel better? Probably not. Was working in a mobile phone shop what he dreamed of doing as a little boy? Probably not.

Sometimes it’s enough to show a bit of restraint, and let it go.