The questing entrepreneur, seeking to develop in Scotland, is

impressed by the professionalism of the ''this is the home of hi-tech''

type of advertisement that greets him at Glasgow Airport. He is a trifle

surprised but not unduly inconvenienced by the next notice he sees: ''We

regret that this Autobank is out of service.''

He wishes to test a link in the local commuter chain, so a friend

gives him a lift to Strathclyde Transport's Hyndland station, where the

electronic indicator is not working. He has to move quickly when a door

on the train fails to open. When he reaches Central station one of the

escalators is also hors de combat.

''Now to get the flavour of this city!'' He strolls along St Vincent

Place and is startled to note that it's much later than he thought. The

clock above Scottish Computer Services Ltd reads 12.05. Wryly he

reflects that a dead clock is dead on time twice every 24 hours.

There is more flavour to come. It is 10.30am and he is standing at the

junction of the Trongate and Argyle, Glassford, and Stockwell streets.

Calamity Clock Corner indeed, where rarely has tempus been seen to

fugit.

The far-off Tron clock checks neatly with his own watch. Hutchesons'

is three minutes slow. Elsewhere, time stands still. Above the Queensway

shop it is 2.20. Opposite, Dorothy Perkins proclaims 9.45. The clock

next to a Gordons sign reads 12.20. As for the double-sided ones,

Bremners displays 3.47 and some minutes after 4.00. Reardons shows 2.20

and 4.46; wonder of wonders, the 4.46 side seems to be inching

backwards.

So, too, is the enthusiasm of our questing entrepreneur. Machines that

remain long out of order reflect deplorably on the citizens who allow

them to be displayed.

Such shoddy and shabby demonstrations of disinterested inefficiency

should have no place in Glasgow at any time, let alone in the

approaching Year of Culture.

The memory of Grantchester Church clock standing at 10 to 3 brought

pleasure to the nostalgic Rupert Brooke, but he didn't have potential

new employers and investors in Scotland to win and impress. If we can't

keep our machines going we certainly won't have ''honey still for tea.''

We may not even have porridge for breakfast.

Robin MacLellan,

11 Beechwood Court,

Bearsden.